Book Review of Dark Clouds, Deep Mercy: Discovering the Grace of Lament
Book Review By: Wayne Boyer
For the last few years Grace Harbor has conducted a Blue Christmas service. “The Blue Christmas service
seeks to acknowledge and lament the brokenness we experience in this world,” says Molly Peele in her
article Why Blue Christmas. This brokenness and loneliness seems especially evident around the
Christmas season when many joyfully celebrate. Following Grace Harbor’s Blue Christmas service last
year (2023) I was given Mark Vroegop’s book, Dark Clouds, Deep Mercy: Discovering the Grace of
Lament. The book sat idle on my desk for nearly a year before I picked it up to read. To be honest, it
remained there for such a long time because I didn’t think it applied to me—I have experienced difficult
days, but I was not in the midst of some great loss in my life. I couldn’t have been farther from the
truth, or more ignorant, in my assessment of the value of this book.
Vroegop says, “To cry is human, but to lament is Christian” (p. 26). I must admit, as a Christian I did not
have a working definition or framework for lament until I read this book. The author defines lament this
way:
“Lament is how we bring our sorrow to God. Without lament we won’t know how to process
pain. Silence, bitterness, and even anger can dominate our spiritual lives instead. Without
lament we won’t know how to help people walking through sorrow. Instead, we’ll offer trite
solutions, unhelpful comments, or impatient response. What’s more, without this sacred song
of sorrows, we’ll miss the lessons historic laments are intended to teach us” (p. 21).
Do we know how to bring our sorrow to God? Do we know how to process pain? Can you identify with
silence, bitterness, and anger towards God? I know I can. Have you been one to offer trite solutions, or
unhelpful comments, or exhibit impatience towards others? I know I have. Vroegop helps us learn how
to grow in this area of our life. He structures his teaching into three parts: (1) learning to lament, (2)
learning from lament, and (3) learning how to live with lament.
In part one, Learning to Lament, we are shown a biblical pattern of lament: turn, complain, ask, and
trust. This is more than a biblical version of the stages of grief (i.e. denial, anger, bargaining, depression
and acceptance). Relying heavily on Psalms and Lamentations, the author shows us the pattern of
turning to God in prayer; bringing our complaints to God humbly, without sinning; asking bold questions
to, and of, God without irreverence; and choosing to trust God. “It takes faith to pray when you are in
pain. Belief in God creates challenging questions, and lament provides the opportunity to reorient your
hurting heart toward what is true” (p. 38). The author concludes, “The steps of lament must be learned.
It is vital to the Christian faith. It is how we make our way through the pains of life while clinging to the
hope of the gospel” (p. 84).
In part two, Learning from Lament, the author argues that lament “allows you to hear the lessons God
intends to teach you through pain” (p. 89). In quoting C.S. Lewis he says, “God whispers to us in our
pleasures, speaks in our conscience, but shouts in our pains: it is His megaphone to rouse a deaf world”
(p. 89, 90). “Lament is one of the ways that a heart is turned toward God’s perspective. When the
bottom drops out of your family, your culture, your city, or your nation, what do you say? If we are not
careful, followers of Jesus can respond with fear, anger, or despair. In so doing we reveal a love affair
with our culture” (p. 103).
The author will explain that we endure suffering through our beliefs, rather than through what we see
or feel (p.110). Key, and at the heart of the book, we find four important principles to remember in the
midst of our pain. The author expounds on Lamentations 3:22–33 to show us how Jeremiah anchored
his heart. We find hope in these truths: (1) God’s mercy never ends; (2) waiting [on the Lord] is not a
waste of time; (3) the final word has not been spoken; and (4) God is always good (p. 112–119).
In his mercy and goodness God uses pain to root out our sin. “We can see more clearly, the misplaced
objects of trust that surface when the layers are peeled back. Pain helps us to see who we are and what
we love. Pain is an uncomfortable but helpful teacher” (p. 136).
In part three, Living with Lament, the author answers the question, “Why lament?” (p. 159–160). He
answers the questions in six practical ways and encourages us to apply these principles both individually
and corporately:
1. Lament provides a biblical vocabulary and a model for talking to God about our pain
2. Lament cracks the door open to talk to God
3. Lament helps us to see that complaining to God is not necessarily sinful
4. Lament validates the expression of pain while providing a framework—a God-centered
structure—so we avoid falling into the trap of self-centeredness, which can take root in times of
deep sadness. Lament endorses expression, but only the kind with the right objective.
5. Lament is a process for our pain. It invites God’s people on a journey of faith as they turn to
God, lay out their complaints, ask for his help, and choose to trust.
6. Lament is a way to worship.
Acknowledging the process of sanctification is in accordance with God’s will (1 Thess. 4:3), let us learn
the lessons of lament as a vital component of that process. And let us be encouraged, that “Jesus bought
the right to make everything right. Even if we are ‘killed all day long’ or are ‘like sheep going to the
slaughter,’ nothing—no sorrow, no disappointment, no disease, no betrayal, not even death—can
separate us from God’s love” (p. 37).
If you are in the depths of despair I realize how difficult it can be to concentrate on anything, much less
read a book. However, Dark Clouds, Deep Mercy will drive you to God’s Word where you will be
introduced to passages that you can hide in your heart and use to speak for you when you have no
words to bear. You will be comforted to have the example of brothers and sisters in Christ who have
gone before you. You will also grow in a fuller understanding of God’s love for you which can be seen
and experienced even in a most difficult providence—you will be driven to focus on God more than your
circumstances.
Maybe you’re living out your Christian life with relative ease (as I thought). Dark Clouds, Deep Mercy
reminds us that we all will experience trials in this life. It’s important to have a good understanding of
the Word of God and know how to properly apply the Word in all circumstances of life. Vroegop
expounds the Psalms of lament well and exposes biblical truths and principles, not only to help you
prepare for your own difficult times, but to prepare you to minister to others in need.
No matter what circumstances you find yourself in at this time, I highly recommend this book as
foundational. The book is easy to read and understand. It is fit for ages as young as the High School
level. The book has merit for counselors and would serve well for two or three who wish to read and
study together.
“A hypocrite, when afflicted by God, resents the infliction, and, like a slave, would run from the Master
who has scourged him; but not so the true heir of heaven, he kisses the hand which smote him, and seeks
shelter from the rod in the bosom of the God who frowned upon him.”
(Charles Spurgeon, Evening, Nov. 19)
